The HealtH
Health | MAy, 2019
16
ISSUE:
issue: MENTAL
mental HEALTH
health
Help
is just
a phone
call away
The befrienders strives
to become a safe place
for ones struggling with
mental health issues
A
Befrienders KL often organises outreach programmes to address depression and suicide issues.
t Befrienders KL, the person on the
phone isn’t trying to sell you something
– they are trying to save your life. If you
haven’t heard of this almost 50-year-old
organisation that’s been secretly saving
lives, it’s time you do.
Befrienders are a group of volunteers who lend
their ears and offer a shoulder to cry on. The Health
speak to Kenny Lim, Executive Director of Befrienders
KL who has been a listening ear for the past 21 years.
the mental health.
“Your feelings are the core of your well-being,” he
states.
Mental health issues on the rise
A recent 2017 survey by the Ministry of Health
found that 18,336 people suffers from various stages
of depression based on health screenings done on
273,203 individuals.
A safe place to vent Taking an emotional toll
on the volunteers
“The organisation kick-started back in 1970. After
the May 13, 1969 incident, a lot of people became
very restless and uncertain. A group of people came
together and felt the importance to have a service
to cater to their troubles – for them to talk out their
worries. That’s how Befrienders KL started.”
According to Lim, the Befrienders doesn’t actually
provide any advice or solution to the problems their
callers have. Rather, they ‘befriends’ them and provide
an ear to listen, a shoulder to cry on, and a safe place
for callers to express their thoughts and feelings. Listening day after day to people struggling through
some of the darkest moments of their lives can take
an emotional toll.
“We always tell our volunteers that whatever hap-
pens in the phone room stays in the phone room. The
confidentiality clause also ensures that we do not
share the calls with our friends or outsiders. Being
affected by a call – it can happen because when you
pick up a call, you don’t know what kind of stories will
be shared. Therefore, we are encouraged to talk to our
fellow volunteers on duty.
Kenny Lim explains the need for some to vent out
their worries and feelings to Befrienders as a way to
ease their mental health issues.
Malaysian callers aplenty
According to Kenny, the Befrienders KL gets about 80
contacts a day. 78 percent would be through phone
calls, 20 percent would be from emails, while the
remaining are face-to-face interactions.
“An interesting thing to note would the increase in
emails. In the past 5 years, it has increased a lot and
I think it’s because the younger generations tends
to lean towards emails. I guess it’s because in the
older days, calling was not so intimidating. However
now even calling on the phone, a lot of the younger
generation are finding that to be rather intimidating,”
says Lim.
It means a lot to listen
“A lot of people tend to ask us – you just listen but
you don’t dole out advice, how does that help?” Lim
expresses.
“When you call the Befrienders, your problems
will very much still be there because we don’t act as
a solution. Our services is more in the line of giving
them a place to vent and share their feelings.”
“When a person is suicidal for example, they tend
to feel like no one understands them which makes
them feel isolated. Therefore by having someone at
the other end of the line who accepts them with no
judgement, it sends a message that it’s not so bad
and can lessen their loneliness. This allows them to
be in a better position to manage their problems,” he
explains.
Relationships and mental health
are the two main issues
According to Lim, the most common issues for callers
has been relationships and mental health issue such
as depression, anxiety, schizophrenia and bipolar
disorders. Family is third on the list.
What if the volunteers are having
personal issues of their own?
“We are getting a lot of emails from younger indi-
viduals and to our surprise, they email us not because
of studies. Instead it’s mostly about social life, friends
and family. Some express that despite parents provid-
ing everything, attention and care is never seem to
be there.”
Lim stresses on the fact that a lot of focus tends to
be placed on academic and physical aspects but never
“If the volunteer is having issues and need time off,
we completely understand because it’s important – if
you don’t take care of your own self, how will you be
able to take care of others?” — The Health
The Befrienders can be contacted through their hotline
at 03-79568145, emailed at sam@befrienders.org.my,
or a face-to-face meeting by appointment.
Want to be a Befrienders volunteer?
Feel like you have the qualities to be a
Befrienders volunteer? We ask Kenny Lim,
Executive Director of Befrienders KL to fill us on
the step by step training before becoming a fully-
fledged volunteer.
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The only requirement is one has be
21 and above.
Attend a preview. A preview is where you will
be explained what kind of work is done at
Befrienders, the commitments involved, the type of
training and expectations.
3
4
If interested, you will be called for
an interview.
If they feel that you are suited to be a volunteer,
you will have to go through eight sessions of
training. Each sessions takes three and a half hours.
The training will touch on topics such as depression,
suicide, active listening and also role plays. This is
where potential volunteers will judge for themselves if
this is something they are committed to doing.
5
After eight weeks of training, there’s supervision
and probation.
According to Kenny, the entire process on
becoming a Befrienders volunteer takes roughly one
and a half years.
“At the end of the training period, we do see
people dropping out. This is because some people
have the notion that they want to come and save or
prevent people from suiciding. Our ways are different,
we don’t tell them to stop and say it’s wrong, we do
it subtly. We place much importance on not giving
advice and not telling what to do. It’s a long, delicate
process because in the end we are talking to people
who are suicidal.”